When I am coaching clients, be it individuals or businesses I always use goal setting as a primary motivator. When the right goal is set, it creates a beautiful energy which helps us to stay motivated and look towards something, whilst creating it in our minds and this not only acts a self-fulfilling prophecy to an extent but also a manifestation of what we want.
I also explore potential obstacles or barriers that can be anticipated en route to achieving the goal, as well as looking at solutions to overcome these or prevent them in the first instance. This assists us in creating a realistic time-frame in which to achieve our goal.
With some clients, the goal may seem out of reach but nothing is out of our reach as long as we take small steps to reach it. The mini goals or stepping stones are important stages of achieving the bigger goal.
Exploring feelings is also a way of creating attachment to the goal we are setting. If the feeling isn’t everything we want it to be then the goal we are setting may potentially not be everything we want. Also, creating the image in your mind helps with visualizing and again holding onto the positive energy surrounding our goal.
Looking at the bigger picture what does achieving a set goal actually help you to achieve? Goals give our life a direction and aim, something to work towards. This could be anything from a new car, new home or a holiday, to something simpler like more free time to spend with the kids or friends.
My common new year’s resolution would be to lose weight. In recent years I have come to understand that I never stuck to it or actually lost any weight because I am comfortable in my body and my skin. I’m not bothered by a few extra pounds hence setting this as a goal, for me, was meaningless. This is why it is important to set goals that we actually want to achieve.
One of the reasons goals are not achieved is because the goal was an implied need and not an actual need, and by drilling down by asking the right questions, the coachee can be assisted in creating and setting the right goal for themselves.
I use the EXACT model of goal setting;
Explicit- A few words, one focus.
Xciting- Positively framed, inspiring.
Assessable- It needs to be measurable in terms of knowing where we are in relation to the goal.
Challenging- it needs to stimulate and stretch us.
Time-Framed- Within a realistic time-line to ensure motivation and focus is not lost. Ideally 3-6 months, for long term goals it is a good idea to break them down into smaller stepping stones to keep motivation.
Whilst it is important to look back on goals we may have previously set, that we have not achieved and assess why we did not achieve them, the best question to ask at this stage would be ‘is it a goal I would set again’? And if it is not then there is no point pondering over it and rather focusing on what it is we want now. When we have set goals in the past that we have achieved, it is important to draw from them; what did we do well, what could we do more of, and most importantly how it made us feel, as this is an emotion we can draw on, achieving a goal is an amazing feeling and focusing on that can help us to create a similar energy for our new goals.
It is important for goals to be positive and for them to make us smile. Keep smiling.
Falguni Patel~ Eternally Positive